Saturday, June 19, 2010


When I think of you and what you did to my brother, I have anger inside. I have forgiven you on the outside, but I don’t think I have on the inside.

Reading on the internet about how Billy died and then going to your trial and hearing all the gruesome details and seeing his pictures, I am sick inside and feel like sobbing. You took someone I loved, someone who I owed my life to, he saved my life from drowning when I was twelve years of age.

In a dream, before he was murdered, I watched him get killed, in my dream he was drawn to his killer by his child. After I found out that you & Vicky, schemed to kill him, I watched you kill him over and over and I hated, I wanted revenge. I saw the suffering inflicted on my mother, a mother who loved her child and expected him to live longer then her. She watched her husband die from a heart attack knowing that it was up to her to raise her children by herself. Then she saw her three sons go to a terrible war, praying that she would see them come safely back home again, just like she prayed for her husband when he left for war during WW11 when she had two babies and one on the way, the one on the way was Billy, her first son.

She was so happy when all her sons returned, but then to get a call from Vicky saying to her. “Your son went and got himself killed.” No mercy from the one who was the judge and executioner of her own husband, the father of her child and the
father of two other beautiful little girls. The son of Emily, the brother of his siblings and the grandfather of seven children he would never get to see.

How could I have mercy for someone who showed no mercy? Then to find out later that you, a so called friend of Billy, a Marine that Billy evidently at one time trusted, a so called patriotic Marine who destroyed a precious life, a gift from God. You must have been scared to death of the one you killed.
How could I have mercy for any of you who showed no mercy? Because I love Jesus and because he gave us the Lord’s Prayer. I realized that if I was going to say that prayer, then I had to forgive others if I wanted God to forgive me.
I cannot promise that I will be able to look at you and feel love, but my goal is to try.

You have all been in prison since you murdered Billy. Justice needs to be served for your sake also, to finally stop running and hiding, to face the piper, to find God and beg him to give you the gift of faith.
Christ loves you. We give up on him, but he never gives up on us. So here is your chance to work on your faith and hopefully to bring God to other inmates.
I pray you have true peace someday and the only way to have that peace is to tell the truth because God is listening and so is the world.

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